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28.06.21

1 min read

WTF: Att känna till sitt egenvärde med Charlotte Williams

Säsong 1 Avsnitt 6

Att känna till sitt egenvärde 💌

I avsnitt 6 av Estrid’s IGTV serie What The Fluff träffar vi Charlotte, som är med för att prata om egenvärde. Hon beskriver vikten av att värdera sig själv, vare sig det är i privatlivet, arbetslivet eller relationer. Charlotte delar också med sig tips kring hur man etablerar sitt värde i arbetssituationer, särskilt för personer i kreativa yrken, frilansare och influencers.

Vad är “What The Fluff”?

Det bästa sättet att skapa förståelse och empati mellan människor är att prata om saker. Dem viktiga, svåra sakerna. Därför skapade Estrid ”What The Fluff”: en IGTV serie där vi bjöd in olika profiler för att prata om svåra saker. Från att bekämpa ätstörningar, till hur det är att leva med en kronisk sjukdom, och vikten av att stötta unga transpersoner - våra gäster har delat med sig om sina personliga erfarenheter kring en mängd olika ämnen, och hjälpt oss skapa en trygg miljö att prata i.

Klicka här för att läsa en transkribering 👀

Hi. So a little disclaimer, I was going to do a cute little, like, get ready with me video, talking you through this topic that I'm going to talk about today, while I put my makeup on. Turns out I can't actually put my makeup on and talk at the same time. So we're just going to have me talking at you. And it's not going to be cute, it's just going to be me talking. So this video is brought to you in partnership with Estrid. You've seen them on my feed before. They are my razor of choice. I just got out of the shower. I have shaved my body. I am as smooth as a baby seal. And I'm ready to talk to you about my chosen subject of self-worth.

So this is a topic that I've been talking about a lot recently. I did a talk on it, but also I do one-to-ones with influencers and people that I work with. I also have been having DM conversations on pretty much all platforms, LinkedIn, Twitter, Instagram, and it's just something that I just feel like we need to be more aware of, our self-worth, and what it means. So first of all, by having a sense of self-worth, it means that you value yourself.

And I think that's something that's so important to note. Self-worth comes from value, that you mean something to the world. And I think that it's such a strong thing to take a step back and look at what you're putting out to the world and what you're doing and thinking about the idea of why am I having so many negative thoughts about myself, my worth, the things I'm doing, my job. Because if you're doing that, it shows that you're not valuing yourself to probably the extent that you need to.

So, I'll put the disclaimer out there that I need you to all understand that when we say the word worth and the other word value, it doesn't necessarily have to mean, financial worth, financial value. It can mean so many different things. I always like to say that when I talk about self-worth, I'm not talking about how much money you have in your bank account, how many followers you have, how skinny you are, how thick you are, how perfectly formed your body is, compared to the Western European gaze that we like at the moment, that's on-trend.

And I think it's just really important to note that worth doesn't fall on those categories. It falls on you as a person and what you're bringing to the world, the story that you're telling. So a few things when we talk about self-worth. A lot of people I speak to don't understand their fees, their pricing, how they price themselves, specifically in the creative industry, be that an influencer or traditional creative. And that's something that is really difficult to navigate, especially because money isn't something that we talk about a lot. So when you are not paid accordingly, it means that you're undervalued, not just undervalued by the people that are doing the work, but you're undervaluing yourself.

So I think it's really important to take stock of everything that you're doing. Take a look at your CV, remind yourself how amazing you are and what kind of offering you're putting out there, and then decide to price that accordingly. And how do you do that if you don't know what other people are charging? Research. If you're a creative, research other roles that are similar to yours and what people are paying in the corporate world, and then figure out what that would look like as a freelancer.

And if you are an influencer, look at Instagram accounts like the influencer pay gap. If you're part of the SevenSix influencer network, then come to us, talk to us about how much you're charging for things, because we're always here to help and find people that can give you that insight that you need, but not to like, pick their brains or take from them, but to just have a genuine conversation and create that kind of community that you need to help support you and you can support others with. So, on the financial side, it's important to understand your worth.

And that's where imposter syndrome comes in a lot. When you don't take stock of what you're giving to the world and what you're giving to your employees or to your audience. And you're just like, oh, my God, you know, as an influencer, let's say I just got loads of followers and I can't believe I now have all these followers. And it's like ok, why do you have these followers? Look at the series of events that led you to get there. You created some content that, I imagine, resonated with people enough and made them want to follow your life. So that's a big deal.

Continue doing that and continue adding value. If you're a creative and maybe an artist or an illustrator and your work is incredible and people are seeing that, enjoy that, enjoy the fact that they're seeing what you are putting out there and then paying you accordingly for it. Because that's the end goal, right? And then we have to think about self-worth in terms of just loving ourselves. So. We talk a lot about financial worth and financial goals and, getting the bag, having the bag, and it's just like sometimes just protect your mental health, protect yourself, make sure that you're balanced, make sure that you're out there with your friends and family in a way that is meaningful. So that's something to look at. I always try to take a step back and it's something that I actually struggle with. And I do it in kind of seasons or quarters. I'm currently doing that at the moment, taking a step back, taking that moment of accountability, understanding that what I'm putting out there for the world might be needed.

It might be great, you know, depending on what it is. But I also need to take a step back and think what am I doing in terms of my personal relationships? How is my relationship, how is my relationship with my parents, my family, my friends, and try and find that balance. And once you have that balance, then you can understand your worth and you can have that confidence because your work doesn't focus around one thing, you're a full, multifaceted human. And so I'm going to leave you with that.

But just to note that self-worth comes in so many different forms and being on the Internet, it's so easy to be bogged down with negative comments and negativity in general. We see so much toxicity and hatred online. So if you do get comments on your posts, or DM's from people that are just gross and they're just being negative and ruining your positive vibe. Remember that those people that sent you those messages or decided to comment have no ownership over your worth, over who you are. They've decided to sit behind a screen, on their keyboard to type messages to you to make you feel rubbish. But you're not going to allow them to. You have the ability to take what they said and ignore it, take what they said and feel sorry for them or to block them to actually not even see what they've said, because you can use the social media restrictions to make a difference, to limit and eliminate certain words from your platform or to restrict people's access to you and just know that that is something that's really important to do, not only for your mood but also for your mental health, because it can be quite a lot to just have people have access to you in that kind of way.

So my biggest tip is to ensure that you take stock of your life, understand what value you're giving, and then how you can continue to do so in a way that's meaningful. Take that into whatever you want it to mean, but always know that your self-worth does not revolve around what other people think. It revolves around your self-value and your confidence.

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